a view into the sordid life i lead

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Bare Necessities

Lila's car came through. There's a story to tell with that whole episode, but we'll leave that for another time. Lila was very gracious is all I can say. Whatever complication came up added to the excitement, but that's about it. Turned out to be a far more expensive trip down to FF tho! Managed to get a ticket for speeding, plus had to pay for 2 train tickets. Ah well, life has it's hidden gems for us.

The house was taken care of for the most part. I've had to make the very hard decision not to put the heat in right now. It's just too much work, and the time and energy just don't exist for me to pull this off. I think the stress level would be too high, and the gain would be too low. Also there's no money for it. The big issue now is to get the lawn moved. Don't know how that's going to happen. There's some talk of Hillary staying at the house, which would work out great. That would at least provide me someone to contact at the house in case anything needs to happen.

I've consolidated all my stuff down to what will fit into the trunk of my vehicle. It's the bare minimum that I need, and that's just the way I like it! There's probably still stuff that I can release from my possession - that'll have to be determined over the next few weeks. The push was really the fact that I'm moving in with the Mexicans and I don't want to have to lug a lot of stuff around.

Living with 2 girls in a place of business is going to be interesting. At first glance Rushad and James are far more clean and organized than these women, but maybe I'm mistaken. I hope I'm mistaken. God please let me be mistaken :-)

The bike will stay at Rushad's until I need it, which will be predicated on how the whole transit thing works - i.e., taking the bus to the train to the bus. If the initial bus is a pain I'll be biking to the train.

Thursday, September 15, 2005


Our life in Chicago has closed, and I've been reduced to the, allegedly, bare minimum. Obviously whin I say minimum I mean there's still a lot of crap in my life. Right now most of the crap is at Rushad's. Let's go down the list of possessions that I deemed essential for my survival for the next 2.5 months:

1. Linux box (ChurchofChai) and Windows box (Cibo). These are now plugged in, online, and necessary. Why? So I can feel like I have a connection to this one thing no matter where I am. More importantly, Jonii can do her Jyotish stuff no matter where she is, hopefully, and I can get information from my machine through my Linux host. This is, without doubt, essential. Can't get rid of this machines for a while.

2. Clothes. I've got a Sun Netra box that contains all the foldables that I need for the next few months. The closet has about a dozen things that I thought I'd need - several shirts, a couple of jackets, and a few things that belong to Jonii. It has sunk in that I don't need this many clothes especially when there's a washing machine available at all times at my disposal.

3. Hardware. There are a couple of boxes of modems, wires, connectors, tools, and all kinds of shit that I know I need, but I probably don't. I think this has to be consolidated down to just the bare minimum - one toolbox with the absolute essential wires, and nothing else! That's going to be a bit of work.

4. Books, magazines, CDs, DVDs. Why this stuff is still here is beyond me. There's no way I'm going to need this for now. I'm sure there was some warped logic in my mind about why I would need this right now. Obviously it evades me. Stress can do strange things to your mind, where you feel like you need to hold on to some pointless things.

5. Bedroll, stuff to take to India. This is the stuff that actually needs to stay - the few things that make sense in my temporary life prior to the big dive.

6. Bicycle X 2. Why the X2? Ok, I have my Kona, which costs over a grand in Rushad's closet. I'm going to be moving in with Abby at the Mexico Solidarity Network (henceforth referred to as "The Mexicans"). I need a bike to get from the mexicans' to the blue line, which is about 15 blocks away. I'm not too crazy about leaving the Kona locked at the CTA - that's a whole day's worth of hacking that someone can get to, and free the bike of its Kryptonite confines. (Plus there's always the bic-pen-hack, which would only take a few seconds). So I've decided to borrow the bike I gave Art - a kinda old and rusted out Trek - and use that as my temporary form of transportation around here. The Kona will be taken back to Fairfield on the next trip down.

Lila passed through Chicago on her way to NYC, and was kind enough to allow me the loan of her car while Jonii was in FF. Basically this allowed me to pare down a lot of my crap. But the above list is after that paring! The plan right now is to drive down to FF with her, and take the train back on Monday. Should be ideal. That way I can get work done on the way back AND I don't have to drive alone!

And then there was 1

Jonii left today. Honestly there's something a bit freeing about being on my own. I've given up my apartment, and have decided to bum at my frinds' places. I'm not opposed to squatting, but I've come to the realization that the sheer volume of possessions in my life is threatening to many ecosystems. How can one person (ok, 2 people) own so much stuff. In reality it's not really a huge amount, at least not in contrast to what the vast majority of the consumo-philic hoards, but still, it's more than i care to call mine.

I'm experiencing a not insignificant amount of anxiety. I'm happy that Jonii has left mainly because my interaction with her was beginning to be primarily disruptive. I think it may the combination of her stress and mine - monumental decisions have been made, and we need to deal with the repercussions for a while to come. Lifestyle changes are not easy, I've heard. Most of my changes in lifestyle have been upgrades. This downgrade is going to be an interesting variation. Jonii's constant re-iteration that I need to be careful about buying dinner for friends, and going out for drinks, and telling me how to manage the finances needles me irrationally. I was well into thinking of her as a nag, and that's good for nobody!

I suspect that the reality of her departure will not sink in for some time. Right now i can use the space, since i need to get a lot of shit together, and feel like i'm making life-altering decisions for the right reasons. Self-analysis time has been at a premium, and the stress of the move has kept us at each other's throats. The me-time should be positive - we'll find out over the next several weeks :-)